The Comments Section … the cheap seats in The Arena (Dare To Lead™)
This year’s Australian Lamb campaign features “The Comments Section” and highlights that “the comments section is getting toxic.”
The advertisement (approximately 3 minutes) can be found here and focuses on how easy it is to be a keyboard warrior who causes conflict; who gets caught up in the moment and responds negatively; who is confused by what is real or not. It also offers the solution of uniting people by bringing them together in-person (over a lamb cutlet).
In Dare To Lead™ we explore The Arena which, amongst other sections, has the cheap seats (referred to as the comments section in the ad). It’s from this section of the arena that we hear the toxic judgments and criticisms, causing disharmony, tensions and uncertainty.
Unfortunately, we tend to pay too much attention to these seats and we don’t focus on the most important seats of the arena which are the seats of empathy and self-compassion.
Who sits in your empathy seats? We don’t need a multitude of people in the empathy seats – just one or two people who know our values and support us in behaving in ways that are congruent with our values. What do the people in your empathy seats do and say that supports you? Is there anything more you can ask them to do or say?
The seat of self-compassion, as you’ve guessed is for us, reminding us to show ourselves support and kindness. If we don’t show ourselves support, we can’t expect it from others. How often do you sit in your seat of self-compassion? What do you do and say to yourself as an act of self-compassion?
Finally, circling back to the solution offered in the ad for uniting people, in your workplace, what solution do you have for bringing people together?
Leadership: Glorious? A burden? Or both?
A few months ago, one of my Dare To Lead™ (DTL) participants said, “We have the glorious burden of leadership.” We had a really robust and insightful group discussion about this comment at the time which really stuck with me, so much so that I shared this comment (with permission) with other participants.
Today, I share it with you for your own reflection and for discussion with your colleagues. What does this mean for your leadership? I encourage you to be curious about thoughts and feelings that emerge – both for others and for you.
Following are a few perspectives that have been shared with me:
- “I’m not sure it’s so much a burden – perhaps more the practice of constant mindfulness. I have definitely become more mindful of what I communicate and how I communicate as I’ve grown my leadership skills. This seems particularly true when faced with my own emotional reaction to things. … PS I’d been sitting in a meeting pondering this all morning ????”
- “I do think that as I’ve progressed in my career I’ve had the burden of making difficult decisions more regularly. It is the accountability and responsibility piece that often comes with leadership.”
- “Nurturing leaders is not without its challenges. It requires patience, dedication, and the willingness to embrace failures as opportunities for growth. Every setback is a chance to learn and improve, both for the mentor and the mentee. For me, nurturing leaders is not just a passion; it's a responsibility I embrace with enthusiasm.”
How do you see it? I’m keen to hear your point of view.
Stories of courage …
In case you haven’t had a chance to read our most recent blog by our guest blogger, Zoe Raftopoulos, you can find it here. In her blog titled, “How can we find courage in everyday moments?” Zoe shares that “I’ve made a conscious choice to lead with courage, and encourage those I work with to do the same". We know courage is contagious – Zoe’s decision to lead herself and others with courage, inspires others to be courageous too; this is evident in the comments on the post … all from the support section.
And another story of courage: A podcast in which Layne Beachley shares her story with Cameron Schwab. She shares her experiences of being in the arena; her body saying “enough”; the shitty/stormy first drafts that consumed her … and, circling back to the arena, she shares that she now has her “dream team” – those people who help her stay aligned with what’s important to her. She also speaks of being a helper, whose aim is to serve others. Thanks to Kevin Smith for sharing this podcast with us.
If you’d like to share what you are reading/listening to and/or your story of courage with us, we would be honoured to share it with our network.
My Courageous Self
I have the data, and I use that data to chart a course.”
Dr. Brené Brown, “Atlas of the Heart”
In her book ”Atlas of the Heart,” Dr. Brené Brown shares conversations that she had with Dr. Kirk Goldsberry, a mapmaker and cartography scholar. He explained that there are two ways to make a map:
- Actual exploration to collect your own data, and
- Using data provided by others
He also explained that maps are about layers, and the one thing that all maps do is to provide individuals with orientation.
This strikingly aligns with insium’s “My Courageous Self” program; a program based on map-making via the collection of data on self through:
- Reflection – collecting and exploring your own data, and
- Feedback from others – collecting and using the data provided by others
Participants in insium’s “My Courageous Self” program each create their own map of past courageous acts. By collecting data on self, the layers in each map are identified and time is spent understanding the interactions of the layers – or as Dr. Goldsberry explains, “the story of the map.”
A participant’s understanding of their own narrative provides the motivation to apply this understanding to future acts of courage, delivering the orientation to chart their own course.
This truly unique program is for everyone in your workplace who wants to build their courage and wants to be brave.
Building courage in others inspires and excites me; let's catch up if you'd like to know more.
Finally, I’m always available for a coffee, a coffee and a walk, or an in-person/virtual meet if you’d like to catch up and share thoughts, learning and questions.
Remember, we all have courage within. We just need a light shone on it.
Dina
(@CourageChick)
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